Friday 27 February 2009

Herman Hesse quote

What could I say to you that would be of value, except that perhaps you seek too much, that as a result of your seeking you cannot find.

Resonates altogether too well with me at this moment in time.

Just over 3 weeks until I arrive in the Bay Area. Petrified. Immobilized by fear. So overwhelmed by "should" and "must" that I have been able to achieve very little towards my goal so far.

But I must not be so pessimistic! There is one golden light at the end of the tunnel and I can't wait to see him.

Friday 16 January 2009

Worth far more than a thousand words

These three artists are masters at letting their subject matter speak for itself.





With thanks to the four very different people who played important roles in these "discoveries".

Sunday 28 December 2008

A dubious poem

Dealing with doubt
a poem by yours truly

Marching on, forging ahead, head held high and proud
A nail or some other jagged thing is snatched upon
Snagged, dragged, jagged it tenaciously rides unnoticed.
Unnoticing, you may carry on without the slightest notion
A minor rip, run or tear
Damage that could easily have been averted.

But much worse
is soldiering on regardless
with false confidence and brutish strength
The fitful jerks and cries of your shredding garment the soundtrack to your struggle.

A booming, echoing soundtrack obliterating original purpose
Finally, fed up and frustrated,
Haste overrides guilt
And so the wound lingers, cankerous and angry now
A precarious patchwork of blame and self-hatred always on the brink of unraveling
It becomes easier to ignore than to address.
Nobody likes being nagged.

Far better, we know
Not only know but can do
Far better to accept the existence of unknown setbacks
Numerous, insignificant, they are but temporary:
A brief change of pace and a sprinkle of attention
and they fall away like dominoes,
fortresses of neglect a-toppling,
Jericho's walls of regret tumbling down.

So I suppose it is true what they say:
a stitch in time really does save nine.

Sometimes I wish I knew what that really meant.
And so, the journey begins.

Slowly, gently.

Cautious steps on unbroken snow. Letting the boat roll and rock underneath, taking the measure of the wind and the water before coaxing it under my control. Letting myself be bathed in the heat and glare of the lights, breathing warmth and confidence into me before walking onstage. Emerging from a long cramped voyage, savoring the smell and taste and feel of the new air.

I have an affinity for metaphors. I feel keenly, some might say too much. I love and despair of many things. I am an explorer and a homebody, a musician and a scientist, an impossible optimist and a crushing pessimist, selfless and self-absorbed, flighty and reliable. On a perpetual quest towards improvement, propelled by naivety and a strong belief in all that is good in the world.

I experience visions.
I experience music.
I experience life.


And it truly is wonderful.